


when did your winning smile begin to look like a smirk?

by yukheischeeks



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Distance but not distant, Domestic Fluff, Established Relationship, First Year College Kuroo, Fluff, Kenma is afraid, Kenma third year, Kuroo is worried, Kuroo loves to tease Kenma, Light Angst, Light Sexual Tension, M/M, Mostly Kenma pov, communication problems, happy ending dw, kenma is worried, mentioned bokuaka
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-04
Updated: 2021-01-04
Packaged: 2021-03-14 15:13:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,728
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28547676
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yukheischeeks/pseuds/yukheischeeks
Summary: It's a hot afternoon, school has started and Kenma is playing videogames, as usual. Kuroo barges in his house, asking to hang out but the setter refuses because he doesn't feel like it. Or maybe is something deeper?or Kenma and Kuroo try to figure out how their relationship will work now that they're walking on different paths
Relationships: Kozume Kenma/Kuroo Tetsurou
Comments: 8
Kudos: 27





	when did your winning smile begin to look like a smirk?

His thumbs were clicking the Nintendo switch’s keys for nearly an hour. It was a spring afternoon, hot but with a fresh wind that made tree fronds shake and was taking the flowers with it, triggering allergies. The blonde interrupt for a moment stretching his hand to the glass of water on the bedside table, re-charging energy. After a few seconds, he resumed his game but lost another time. He snorted and started over. The room was very quiet and there was a relaxing and calm vibe. After another ten minutes, he lost and snorted again, more annoyed and bored than before. He throwed his head back, almost clashing with the headboard and closing his eyes for recover his concentration.

_Okay Kenma, you can do it. It is not difficult, you just need to avoid the attacks and strengthen your defence. You can win this level._

The boy crossed his legs, ready for another try. Outside children were playing soccer noisily, in the near playground. It was a very beautiful day to spend outside and certainly, many people were enjoying the weather. His friends asked to him to hang out but he refused, rather than volleyball he wanted to stay at home playing videogames enjoying the silent and peace.

“Kenma!”

The door suddenly opened, a tall dark haired boy crashed into his room breaking the quiet. Kenma startled and diverted his eyes away from the game just a few seconds but it was enough to make him loose… again.

“I can’t believe it. Kuroo-san, you cannot enter in my room so suddenly.” He complained with widened eyes. The intruder put on the floor his bag and started waking to the bed.

“Oi, Kenma! I came to pick you up.” Kenma ignored him and started over the level, repeating in his mind that he would not lose this time.

“Where are you taking me?”

“To the park, obviously. I texted you this morning, perhaps your memory is not working?”

“I said I wasn’t going. It's yours that doesn't work.” Kuroo snorted rolling up his eyes, he already knew Kenma was hopeless. His golden eyes were following frantically what was going on the little screen but he could maintain as well the conversation with the elder without problems.

“I simply ignored your answer...”

“So it's your fault, not mine.”

“... But I’ve decided you would go, no matter what. Come on, we need to get there in an hour.”

“I said I wouldn’t come.”

Kuroo shook his head annoyed. The bed folded under Kuroo’s body, he was ready to take Kenma out of his room. The dark haired approached the younger who wasn’t paying him any attention. He spread his legs, positioning himself in the middle and keeping his body up with his elbows.

“Kenma…”

“What is it, Kuroo-san?”

“Get ready.”

“I’m busy. I'm doing hot boy shit.”

Kuroo bursted laughing, he was losing his hopes and patience but at least Kenma definitely knew how to use that filthy mouth of his looking totally unbothered. Not at all though, that familiar sound actually dragged his attention and his eyes flew a little instant on Kuroo's smirk. A little blush started to fill his cheeks but he was determined in maintaining his composure.

_No, Kenma. It's not the moment for this, come on!_

Kuroo sighed, letting rest his head on Kenma's right thigh. He knew eventually Kenma would follow him, as always, he needed just to put in more effort to convince him. However, the boy kept playing his game, ignoring him in the most natural way.

_Fuck._

Kuroo's hand was climbing Kenma's left leg slowly, tapping him here and there, reaching his hip and pretending to massage him.

“What are you doing?”

“Relaxing you. You look kinda stressed, you keep frowning.”

“Playing dirty, uh?”

“Me? Never.”

_Focus on the game, focus on the game, focus on the game._

And when Kuroo raised his head to his right hip leaving a little kiss, the blonde tried with all.his means to stay still and not flinch at the sudden contact. But pure adrenaline was starting flowing in his veins and in that position, Kuroo looked more attractive than ever.

“Damn.”

Kenma lost again and his eyes curved down, defeated. He would never admit the reason was his damn boyfriend who kept provoking him. The other immediately took advantage and, before he resumed the game with his hand lowered the Nintendo switch surrounding his hips with his arms and abandoning his head on Kenma's belly.

“Kuroo-san…”

“Mh?”

“I can’t play in this position. It's uncomfortable.”

_No it's not, I could literally stay for days like this, just with his warm embrace and strong arms._

“Come to the park with me. Akaashi and Bokuto will be there as well.”

“I don’t want to. We will play volleyball for sure.”

“Has it ever been a time you wanted to play volleyball?” Said Kuroo raising his head and looking directly at him in the eyes. Kenma looked away, he couldn't lose just for a smirk. The most beautiful smirk ever just for him. Kuroo didn't look at anyone else like that, he always had all his attention so why he couldn't get used to it? Why he kept feeling butterflies in his stomach whenever they were together?

“It’s useless. Look at me.”

“No.” A genuine laugh escaped from Kuroo’s lips and that sweet sound attracted immediately Kenma’s attention again. But this time he turned his face straightaway meeting the gaze of Kuroo’s eyes.

“What are you staring at?” Asked the elder with a cheeky smile.

“You’re pretty, Kuroo-san.” Answered the blonde haired without second thoughts.

“But you know what?” Kuroo’s eyes darkened even more, full of provocation. “I’m even prettier after a kiss from you.” He said with the most impudent smile existent in the world.

Kenma lowered his face, fidgeting with his shirt. He knew, just a signal and soft lips would be on him without any hesitation. But giving Kuroo what he wanted was actually a win or a defeat?

“I am waiting.”

_Ugh, who cares._

After a few moments, looking directly in the eyes of his boyfriend, he surrounded his neck with his arms, attaching his hands behind Kuroo’s broad shoulders. Leaning his face to him, he made their lips encounter gently. Kenma's mind was spinning. He loved their bodies pressing together, fingers that usually played with his blonde locks, Kuroo's care for every tiny piece of him.

In his heart, he knew Kuroo was the best out there. He wouldn't find another one like him anywhere. He always knew what was going on in his mind, how to made his insecurities fall apart, how to make him comfortable. Kenma knew he was pretty social awkward and for a long time he thought he would never find anyone who would care so much for him, for example how Bokuto and Akaashi cared for each other. He envied them for a long time, wondering if being too different was a problem. Sometimes he happened to question himself and his actions, if maybe he's giving in only to get Kuroo's approval, scared that if one day he would say no, Kuroo would get tired of him.

Kenma sit on the former captain lap enjoying that moment. Now that Kuroo entered in college, their time together kept decreasing and it was rare for them to share some intimacy. It was strange to not have Kuroo around him so much as before. It was a relief, he would always push Kenma to be more sociable or simply hang out, but the blondie always came back home drained. But without him it was difficult to fulfill the promises he made for example talk more to his classmates, don't skip volleyball practice, eat well. Without Kuroo constantly checking out how he was doing, he partially lost his motivation. What was the use of he wasn't there?

“Now, you get out of bed…” Kuroo grazed their noses before restarting kissing him again. “… and get ready your stuff for the training.”

Their tongues were dancing together, twisting over and over, while Kenma held tight Kuroo and started playing with his dark hair.

“Got it?” Kuroo broke the kiss but his eyes looked at an unsatisfied Kenma, who was leaning to him aiming at the lips. So he moved away.

Kenma wasn't good with words. The sweet talk was Kuroo's thing. Well, actually he knew how to use sarcasm and how to be blunt and direct, when needed. But when it came to express his feelings or say what he wanted... That's totally on another level of difficulty. Maybe it was because he was shy and introverted. Maybe because he always was on his own. Or maybe because he felt like people were doing him a favour keeping him company, they actually didn't enjoy themselves so it would be rude to disappoint whoever chose to spend his time with him.

With Kuroo, he found out a new way to talk. Through his gestures and actions, he learned how to obtain what he wanted. He learnt that his body, his expressions were fundamental to show his discomfort if he didn't have the courage to say a sincere 'no'. It was their own personal language that Kuroo mastered in no time.

Kenma yanked Kuroo from his black t-shirt begging for his body and his lips again. Kenma hoped Kuroo would understand his intentions right away but there was nothing he could do.

“I hate you… Okay, I’m going.” Whispered annoyed. Kuroo smiled victorious, satisfied.

“Good boy.” Kenma was already leaning again to him, hoping for a kiss that Kuroo did not want to give him.

“Kuroo-san… I said I’ll came.” He complained with a sullen expression.

“Oh yeah, soon you’ll certainly came.” A smirk opened his way through Kuroo’s lips and the boy sat with crossed legs on Kenma’s bed, inviting him on his lap.

Kuroo left to Kenma the lead of the kiss, with slow but deep moves. His tongue was not shy anymore like before and it was interlacing with Kuroo’s one in the sexiest possible way.

“I have no intention to waste time before we go.” Whispered Kuroo in a mischievous way, with his hands on Kenma’s skin under his shirt before came back to his boyfriend lips.

But a light flinch surprised him.

"You okay?" Asked Kuroo, noticing an unusual reaction.

"Yeah. Why?" Kuroo kept his hands on Kenma's waist, caressing his hips a little while looking directly at him in the eyes. As soon as he realized the setter was avoiding his gaze, his craving for something more disappeared.

"Sure there's nothing you wanna talk about?" Asked again Kuroo, putting his head in the hollow of his neck leaving one little kiss.

"Yeah, there's nothing. I thought we were about to do... Something." Kenma kept his hand interlaced behind Kuroo's neck, enjoying his warm breath on the skin.

"Since when you were expecting something? Since when you saw me today or have you been thinking about this for days?" Kuroo talked slowly, tingling him with his words and getting ready to leave a little hickey.

"Well uhm... I just thought it's been a few weeks since the last time we saw each other so..."

College was amazing. Or at least, Kuroo kept saying that. To Kenma it was the reason why he often felt lonely at night. His boyfriend was busy with the lectures, some department dinners, firsts homeworks... It wasn't very pleasant to know that the boy you're in a relationship with lives next to you but you don't get to see him for entire days. At least five minutes. No, Kenma wasn't that lucky.

"So what? You think you owe me something?"

"N-no... Not at all..." Kenma looked everywhere trying to find an excuse but it was difficult to stay focused while Kuroo's lips were sucking so hard on his neck.

_Don't overthink. He's here with you now._

Suddenly Kuroo pushed both of them on the bed.

"Your skin is so beautiful. I'm sorry for ruining it." Said sarcastically the black haired, raising his head.

"Nevermind. I like it." Kuroo raised a hand tracing Kenma's facial features: with delicacy, he drew the outline of his lips, gently touched his nose, stared at his eyes, pinched lightly his cheeks and left a forehead kiss.

"If you don't wanna do it, just say it."

"But it's been so long..."

"Who cares. I'm not gonna die if we don't have sex. What do you want? Tell me."

Kenma swallowed and tried to push him away but he was definitely stronger than him.

"I missed you. I'm sorry for acting petty."

"You're not petty at all. I missed you too, kitten."

"Don't call me that."

"Why not? You're acting like a shy kitten right now. You're cute."

"Stop it or I'll punch you." Kuroo chuckled seeing how Kenma tried to hide his red cheeks.

"I should be the one apologizing. I hate when you do things only to please others."

"I'm sor-"

"Do it only for me though. Other people can't tell when you're doing ot out of your own will and when you're not." Kuroo sighed and took a blond lock between his fingers.

"But I can. You're cute when you try to keep up with me, you're so amazing. You're lucky I'm not selfish."

"I trust you. I know you would never take advantage of me."

"Ugh, can you stop... Please? My heart is racing like crazy." Kuroo out his head on Kenma's chest doing his best to hide his embarrassment but his smile widened more when he heard Kenma's heartbeat.

Three months. Three months since when Kuroo stopped being part of Kenma's daily routine. The short break after graduation was wonderful. They spent everyday together, hanging out or staying by themselves. It looked like Kuroo moved in with Kenma, since was there day and night and when he wasn't, he went early to make breakfast and came back late after Kenma was asleep. Kuroo knew Kenma wasn't the type of crying for these things, he didn't expect some dramatical scene the day before his third year would start. But the first day he had to go to school alone, he was sad. College lessons weren't even started yet so Kuroo spent the night at Kenma's. Nothing seemed wrong, they were perfectly okay, it was a normal night. Kenma woke up first, clearly. He stayed in bed longer than other days staring at the boy next to him. Kuroo was deeply sleeping and probably didn't notice how, in a pure act of mixed affection and sadness, Kenma held him right.

_Just another five minutes._

Probably one of the worst awakenings. The feeling of being unable to enjoy your current happiness because you know something worst is gonna happen. Kenma was in his arms in that moment, he smelled good, he felt safe but in no time he would be alone for the first very time in so long. How do you prepare for this?

"If you wanna stay here, I can ditch Bokuto. It takes me one minute to call him."

"No... Don't cancel."

"Come on, we already know they're gonna be late because of Bokuto. And I came here early to spend more time with you." Every word that came out from Kuroo was making him smile. It was nice feeling important. Feeling loved.

"Why you weren't here in the morning?" As soon as he realized what he asked, he regretted. He didn't say that on purpose... Not completely.

"Studying at home. It's almost mid terms time for me."

"Oh. Okay." Suddenly silence dominated the room. Kenma lost all the confidence, scared by the possibility that another uncomfortable question came out. Uncomfortable for him to say and to hear the answer. But Kuroo payed attention at every little detail.

"Don't overthink. What's going on?"

"Nothing, I swear."

"The fact that you're saying 'I swear' make me thinks something is going on." Kenma snorted keeping looking at the ceiling.

"How is school going?"

"Fine."

"And volleyball?"

"Perfect."

"You're not playing instead of studying, right?"

"No."

_Stop caring about me. I'm not a baby. I don't need someone looking after me._

"I'm just worried, sorry. I don't get to see you so much and it's driving me nuts, I'm afraid you think I don't care about you."

"What are you now, a mind reader?"

The tone of his voice was quite high, a little trembling at the end but enough to alarm Kuroo. He was used to it, though. He knew Kenma was difficult to deal with and it would took ages to have a clear response. But he was ready to it.

Kuroo moved away from Kenma's body to lay next to him, put his head on the pillow and looked at him. Kenma held back asking what he was doing but his eyes were staring at him. Before he could realize, Kuroo placed a hand on his cheek and leaned to him. The kiss was meant to relax him even more, soothing him in his mouth. He kissed Kenma slowly, reassuring him. He tasted like candy. He wanted to make sure to let him know that he loved him, even without words.

"You know what? It's been three months but it's strange not being able to see you everyday. During breaks I stay with my friends, I miss going to your class. I wonder what you do during your breaks." Kuroo moved aside looking at the ceiling, sighing.

"Everything is knew. I have so many things to do, sometimes it's suffocating. Sometimes I'm so tired, the only thing I want is to hug you. Sometimes I study for hours and hours, I think about you. Where are you, distracting me? Making me procrastinate a little bit? Saying it's fine, I'll do it later? I live next door but I feel so distant."

Kenma took a deep breath before speaking. "You need to rest. You're always overworking yourself." He wasn't good at comforting people. The only idea that came in his mind was to search for Kuroo's hand and interlacing their fingers.

"This little time I get to spend with you it's so precious. I don't care if we're alone or not. If you're not fine, I'm not as well. I'm sure that if you're sad, I will be too because I won't be able to think about anything else." Kuroo turned to him and got closer, placing their foreheads against each other.

"So if I am the reason of your sadness, tell me. I'll try my best. I'll think of you all the time so I could make things better. I don't want you to feel like this, that we have to do something just because I want. You're important as well. You're important to me." Kenma closed his eyes and put an arm around Kuroo's waist. He wanted to hear clearly every little sound that came out of his mouth, trying to maintain his temper and not crying. His heart beated like crazy.

"I know you've changed and you're not alone anymore without me. But I really want to think that without me, you're sad as well I am without you. I'm so selfish for this and I'm sorry. I miss our days together and-"

"I love you."

Kuroo stopped talking, as always when Kenma talked to give him all his attention. But this time, he skipped a beat in surprise.

"I... I'm lonely. I'm always worried you're not eating well. I know I don't eat well but you do, you're working so hard these days. Who will be there for me if it's not you? I'm sad because you're next to me but a the same time I don't have the courage to barge in your house like you do. I feel like if I text you, I'll distract you, or worst, annoy you." His golden eyes locked with the brown ones of Kuroo. Kuroo always found them hypnotizing, they were another of the beautiful things that made Kenma who he was. Probably another reason he thought his boyfriend was the prettiest in the world.

"And you don't need to ditch Bokuto. I want to stay with you but... What I really want is to make sure you love me. You're thinking about me. I'm always saying that you annoy me when you care about me, but it's nice when you're worried. I don't need anything else because we're gonna be together for a long time. We can be by ourselves another time."

"I love you. I love you so much. I really love you so much." Kuroo finally hugged him in return, smiling and placing a lot of little kisses on his forehead. Whispering that trivial three words.

Both of them couldn't wish something better. Kenma hid his face on Kuroo's chest, smiling and wishing time to stop. To feel that embrace forever. To be this happy forever. Who knows when will happen another time.

"I think we're idiots. We've never had this kind of talk before school, before college..." Stated Kuroo with his chin on Kenma's head.

"Yeah. We were so caught up with ourselves that we didn't think of anything else." Kenma nodded in response, agreeing. His smell was nice and after days and days of worries, he finally felt good. He finally was in the only place he wanted to be.

A phone rang interrupting their moment of peace.

"It's mine. Who is it?" Kenma turned to he phone clinging on Kuroo, he didn't have any intention of letting go of him.

"Akaashi. He's saying they're gonna be late."

"Reply that we're gonna be late as well." Kuroo chuckled and checked the hour. "Wait, we're really gonna be late! It's thirty minutes of bus from here!" He jumped out of the bed and quickly looked for a volleyball.

"Yeah, I know." Kenma didn't understand what was happening, he just sit on the edge of the bed, smiling at Kuroo with messy hair. He pointed with the finger to the closet.

"Are you saying that you knew we were late?! I thought you said that because you wanted to stay here more time!"

"Also but I guess you noticed." Kenma took his time while Kuroo ran to the door for his shoes.

"Don't laugh, you little brat! We have a bus to catch!"

**Author's Note:**

> hi hi! i'm emily, I'm so glad you made it here <3 if this fic reminded you another one, probably it's my first work (now it's deleted) which had a very similar plot but with fewer words, like 1100 ???  
> I wanted to write something for the new year and I was unsatisfied with my previous work so I decided to rewrite and this came up! Hope you enjoyed, english is not my first language but I tried my best <3


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